This weekend, I had the surreal experience of watching two good friends marry each other and performing the ceremony. It was my first time as an officiant, and it could not have been more genuine, and intimate and funny. We were perched high up on a mountain view, about an hours drive from Santa Fe. It was a perfect day. Tess and Ben are one of those weddings its fun to be at because 1. I believe in them 2. they are hilariously good company. Anyways, I wrote a little thing for their ceremony and I wanted to share it here as well. Thanks guys for trusting me with such a task, and I look forward to seeing you on my turf soon :)
Love is a Museum Love is a Hotel
I’ve always heard that the biggest trigger of memory is location.
Individually and collectively, you guys are so adventurous. As I’ve been thinking about this, I’ve had the thought that love is like a museum and love is like a hotel.
One of the functions of love is memory. We all desire someone to bear witness to our bravery. Someone for whom we don’t have to make introductions. Somewhere we can take our name tag off and be ourselves. Love is willingly choosing to be the cloud of memory that the years will be uploaded into.
As you guys grow together, you will build a museum together. Filled with a timeline of success, of struggle, of commitment. I’m so honored to be here with you for one such day, but there will be many to come. As you get older, this museum will help tell the story of who you were to each other and to all those who come after you. Your museum will be beautiful.
Love is also a hotel room.
In every person and in every relationship is a need to be reborn.
One thing I’ve always believed is that hotels are fascinating because they are nameless places. There are no indicators of history there, non descriptive rooms. You could be anywhere in the world there, and you could be anyone in the world.
We all carry in us many people. Sometimes they exist together, sometimes they come out sequentially. In the same way we pass from child to adult to old age, we take on different characteristics as we grow in relationship.
The hotel is a symbol of transition. It represents a place of travel and change. As you guys move through life together. Some things will fall off of you. Somethings will stay. No matter how much these changes seem scary, they are inevitable and should be celebrated.
I hope that when those moments come, you guys will make room in a hotel for each other to evolve. To travel and to return to each other as needed. Love is a museum and love is a hotel. And my hope and belief for you Tess and you Ben is that you always have these two directions to move in.
Chance may have played a roll in bringing you together, but self awareness, kindness, and love will keep you there. Everyone here is here because they believe in you. As a community we support you, and we will be there to love you no longer just as individuals but as one cohesive unit of measurement.
Love is a museum and love is a hotel.
The power of Love is knowing what to remember and what to forget